Time and time again we seek others for advice when the answers are clearly in our own mind, we are simply too afraid to acknowledge them, why? Are we afraid of being alone? What is it about our own instincts in love that we have chosen to ignore? Why from the second a first serious doubt enters our mind do we not respond to it? Is it not true that EVERYONE who has experienced a break-up finds someone else? Why can we not see this? Everyone has a bad relationship at some point in there lives.... that is simply the chain of life. But the other factor of life is that it moves on! Whether you are single or not... the sun is going to come up the next day!
FACT, you as a human being deserve to be respected by the person you are with. Your hopes, dreams, concerns, feelings, thoughts, beliefs, family. and everything else you hold important to yourself, must be respected by the other person. Your partner may not have the same feelings, but they must respect them, or it is over.
FACT, if you feel your relationship is wrong, unethical, unhealthy, or dangerous, it probably is. Get out!
FACT, communication is key in relationships. You have a problem? Speak your mind to your partner. If this gets you nowhere, if you feel that you are not being heard, or if you feel in danger of making them mad, get out. Bottled feelings result in a bottled person, talk these things out with your significant other. No amount of internet posts are going to tell you anything clearer than your own mind.
FACT, if things end, there is someone else for you. There is someone out there for everyone. You will find someone who respects you and feels the same for you as you feel for them.
Love is blind. and sometimes we look at red flags as little flaws that we all hope will change. also, when you have your heart and soul into something, it can be very hard at times to just walk away. When someone meets you, they always try to put thier best foot forward, and by the time the real them comes out, a part of you is hoping that it is a faze that they are going through and will soon come out of. I agree with all of your facts and you make very good points, but at times, it can be hard to believe when the person that you've given ever ounce of yourself to has caused you so much pain.
Our lives have become so busy and consumed with other things that we aren't listening and we don't hear that we still small voice within to know whether we can trust it or not. Our world is too busy and life has given us too many distractions with all of our modern technology that we don't take time to be silent.
It's that sick feeling in your gut, the butterflies that appear suddenly for no reason, your body is giving you the signals and within the dreams we see in our sleep as our subconcious whispers silently. Sometimes all we need is to take a moment to quietly sit still within our own selves to hear.
I think that sometimes we really don't want to face the truth. We all know the truth deep down inside, but we hope that someone will say something that will make us feel better and maybe give us a little hope. We know when love is bad for us, we just don't want to admit it. When you're truly in love you don't see things that are obvious to others, and not every situation is that black and white (happy-unhappy) What when you're in between? Does it make you unhappy when problems occur in the relationship? Is that a sign you should give up or do you fight and try and make yourself happy again, make the relationship work. Or does that mean you're selling yourself short?
It is true that not all relationships are that black and white. Giving up and running away when something becomes difficult is not the thing to do, obviously. However, there are certain things that most people post about, that are obvious things to walk away from. Such as, disrespect, dishonesty, infidelity, ill-acceptance of a person, things that we know in our heart are wrong. If we are being told by the person we are with that we are "stupid" or are being insulted, and pretty much being shot down on a daily basis, you walk away. If there is abuse or danger, you walk away. If there is a threat to your own morals, or way that you have envisioned leading your life, such as your family, or infidelity, walk away! If you can not discuss your feelings, or if you feel you are not being heard, or respected, then walk away.
There are many things that go wrong in a relationship that we truly know in our heart are wrong that we should walk away from, but don't. Having an argument about who is going to take the trash out, is not the kind of thing to break up over, but having the person treat you like the trash to be taken out, is the thing to walk away from.
It is difficult to walk away from something you have convinced yourself is right for you, but the truth of the matter is that we have convinced ourselves that these situations are right because we are too afraid of being alone, or because we are too afraid of being wrong. But the emotional backlash and damage of an unhealthy relationship is a lot more severe than one spending some time without a partner.
We don't trust our instincts b/c we don't wan't to believe something so bad could be true.. like the saying you need to see it to believe it.. if you ignore it you hope it would go away.. but it never does! Now i know to always trust my gut feelings.